


Vulnerable

by nadiaselite



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: 5x08, Bellarke, Bellarke Endgame, F/M, Fluffy bellarke, bellarke season 5, it's wild, season 5 episode 8, soft bellarke, vulnerable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 09:29:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15070226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nadiaselite/pseuds/nadiaselite
Summary: This fic was inspired by twitter user @bellarkefeelSummary: Bellamy goes to tell Clarke what he just did. Lots of crying and lots of hugging and more?





	Vulnerable

Clarke sat in the corner of her cell with her hands buried in the palms of her hand. The sound of footsteps slowly made their way closer to her, the heavy opening and closing of the door leading to her room. She immediately stood up, eager to see what was going on. To make sure Madi was okay. To make sure Bellamy was okay.

It wasn’t until she saw Bellamy’s face peek through the door that she felt a wave of relief overcome her body. His arms immediately wrapped her into a tight embrace as he walked up to her.

“Clarke. Thank god.” He held her as close as possible, one hand behind her head to hold her in place and the other tightly gripped her waist. A part of him knew she’d be fine, but another part of him was too scared to even imagine the things they could have done to her.

Clarke couldn’t contain the tears anymore, all her emotions pouring out before her. Pulling herself out of his grasp she leaned away from him. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him.

She wasn’t sure what she was crying for. Maybe it was the satisfaction that everything would be okay. Maybe it was the fact that this was the most intimacy they’d shared since they were in the prisoner ship. Or maybe it was the overwhelming feeling of knowing she wasn’t fighting for herself anymore.

“Where’s Madi? What happened to Octavia?” There were a million questions running through her brain, but those were the only two that seemed to matter.

“It’s okay. I kept my promise. Madi is fine.” And with that Clarke wrapped her arms around him once more, more grateful than ever to have him back. This was the Bellamy she knew, the Bellamy she loved.

“But Octavia…” Bellamy rested his chin on Clarke’s shoulder. His decision weighing heavily on his heart. “She’s locked up.”

Clarke slightly pulled away, completely taken back by his change in decision. “But Bellamy.”

“I know.” He hung his head low, the disappointment now unbearable. “I know. But I had no other choice.” His eyes slowly made their way up Clarke’s figure until they landed back on her soft blue eyes.

“But she’s your sister.” Even after 6 years, Bellamy loved Octavia, no matter what she’d turned into. To sacrifice her to Diyoza to save Clarke’s life _again_ was more than she’d ever imagined.

“She _was_ my sister.” The guilt and pain were replaced with an uncontrollable anger. “Everything I knew her as, everything I raised her to be meant nothing Clarke. I meant nothing to her anymore.”

Clarke grabbed his hand with both of hers, giving it a gentle squeeze. “It’s not your fault, Bellamy.” Shaking her head she stared at the floor, trying to wrap her mind around what happened, what she could have possibly said to push him to this point. “But what made you change your mind? You could have just talked to her?”

“She wanted to kill you, Clarke,” Bellamy yelled his voice slightly cracking when he uttered her name. “It was either you or her.”

“So, you picked me.” Clarke’s voice was so low she could barely hear herself. 

“Yes.” His voice was lower than before, the lump in the back of his throat almost too much for him to fight.

“Why?” She couldn’t catch her breath as she stared up at him through her lashes. Almost too scared to hear the truth.

“Because I love you.” His voice echoed throughout the hollow room. A silence lingered between them, both of them incapable of meeting each other’s gaze.

Bellamy stared at the floor. It was true, it had been for as long as he’d known her. He loved the way she challenged him, the way she carried herself with immense confidence, the way she made him feel. There wasn’t a single thing he didn’t love about her. Even when he thought she died he loved her. Not telling her was his biggest regret and he suffered every day because of it.

But not things were different. She was alive. She was in front of him. But he felt guilty. He loved Echo. But even she knew he’d never love her like he loved Clarke. He owed it to her to talk to her, but he couldn’t wait any longer. It was painful to even be around her. Pushing her away was the only way he could cope, but now almost losing her again he just couldn’t take it anymore.

The words weighed heavily on Clarke’s heart. She knew how she felt about him. She knew since Praimfaya left her abandoned by everything and everyone she loved. She knew because as much as she craved the presence of her mom, dad, or Wells the only person who kept her sane was Bellamy. He was the only one she’d found herself praying for every day. That he was safe, alive, healthy.

Clarke waited years to hear those words come out of his mouth and now that she’d heard them she didn’t know how to feel. She wanted to say it back, but couldn’t quite find the strength to say anything at all. She was in shock.

“I love you, Clarke,” Bellamy whispered once more this time with fear instead of confidence.

Bellamy felt the regret as he watched Clarke’s eyes meet his. “I’m sorry. This isn’t how I wanted it to happen, but I couldn’t hold it in anymore.” He stepped closer, his hand hovering above her shoulder too scared to even touch her.

“Being around you was hard, it _is_ hard.” Bellamy dropped his hand shaking his head as he stepped away, facing the wall to mask the tears threatening to break free. “I can’t do it.”

Clarke quietly stepped up behind him. She closed her eyes for a moment taking in the intimacy of the moment. Her hand hovered above the small of his back for a few moments before she fully pressed it against him. “Bellamy.”

Her voice was small. She hadn’t been this vulnerable in over six years. But standing right there with Bellamy she felt like she was completely transparent, but she also felt safer than ever.

Bellamy let out a deep breath upon contact, the muscles in his body immediately relaxing beneath her touch. Clarke was and always would be his home. His heart was wherever she was.

“Then stop.” Clarke stepped around him, her hand slowly sliding down across his back until it landed on his hip. She stared up at him through her lashes, rage filling her eyes. “Stop fighting. Stop pushing me away.”

Dropping her hand at her side, she clenched it into a tight fist as she lowered her head. “Do _you_ have any idea how hard it’s been for _me_?” And now it was like all her emotions were all balled up in her throat threatening to break free.

“I spent six years with no one, but Madi. _Six years_ Bellamy.” She fought the tears keeping his gaze, the anger completely transparent in her expression. “I spent every day talking to _you_ . I spent every day telling Madi stories about _you_. All of you.”

A large tear slipped down her cheek running down her neck and disappearing into her shirt, but Bellamy’s eyes were locked onto hers. The pain in her eyes. The pain in her voice.

“She looked up to you. _I_ looked up to you. And what do you do? You come down and you push me away. Act like I don’t exist. Like I don’t even matter to you.” Clarke’s breath hitched, the tears now uncontrollable. The pain she’d felt in since she’d been reunited with the people she considered her family all pouring out between them.

“Clarke,” Bellamy breathed. Seeing the pain that she’d been carrying for so long made his heart clenched tightly. “If you didn’t matter do you really think I would have put Octavia into a coma?”

His voice came out more aggressive than he’d intended. But he was hurting too. Whether she knew it or not.

“Damn it, Clarke. I care about you more than anyone. _Everyone_ knows it.” Octavia’s words replayed in his head. _Pleading for the life of a traitor who you love?_

“I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry I left you behind. I’m sorry I didn’t come down sooner. I’m sorry that I didn’t radio you.” His breathing was heavy now, the tension growing between them. Taking a deep breath he allowed himself to calm down once more. “I’m sorry.”

Clarke shook her head stepping closer to Bellamy. Bellamy almost immediately took a step back, the proximity too close for him to handle. But she continued to walk towards him until he found himself cornered in the wall.

“Tell me this. Do you love Echo?” Clarke kept her face passive as she stared up at Bellamy.

“I do.” It was true, he did love her. He’d been in space with her for six years, three of which he spent completely resenting her. “I loved her because I thought she was what I deserved.”

Upon seeing her expression change Bellamy continued. “In space, I spent three years absolutely hating her. I blamed her for everything. For losing Octavia, having to go into space instead of being in the bunker, but more importantly for losing you.”

“After three years of pushing her away, I let her in. I decided that maybe it was what you would have wanted. Or maybe it was what I deserved for all the shit things I’d done in my life. So, I settled for Echo the same woman that tried to kill me, you, Octavia, all of us.” Bellamy regretted a lot of things in his life, but something that he felt most guilty about was leaving Clarke behind.

“After letting her in I realized she wasn’t that different from me. Everything I did was for my sister. Everything that she did it was for her people. We’d both done things we’d regret. She understood the darkness my past carried.” Bellamy shook his head. He was betraying someone he considered to be family. But it was because Echo was his family that he knew she would understand.

“And how about now?” Clarke kept her eyes slightly lowered, keeping their eye contact was becoming too much for her.

Bellamy tilted her chin up to capture her gaze. “Now it’s different. _We’re_ different.” His eyes ran down her face until they found her soft pink lips, her tongue gliding across her bottom lip before he brought his eyes back to hers. “I love _you_ . It’s always been _you._ It’ll always be _you._ ”

With that Clarke couldn’t contain herself, wrapping her arms around his neck as she pulled him into her. It wasn’t just any kiss. It was _the kiss_. The kiss she’d waited years for, the kiss that kept her up late at night.

Their lips moved in sync, his hands automatically running down her hips until they were behind her thighs lifting her off the ground. Her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, her fingers digging into his hair.

Bellamy turned her around, pushing her against a wall holding her in place as his lips tore from hers as he kissed her behind her ear and down her neck. She tasted absolutely divine like the berries she’d told them about.

Clarke pushed her head back against the cold cell wall as Bellamy kissed down her neck, his teeth skimming her skin. She closed her eyes, taking in every touch and every feeling at that moment.

It wasn’t until Bellamy pulled away from that she felt herself wanting more. A sad unsatisfied sound voluntarily vibrating from the back of her throat. She dropped her legs back down to the floor, her body still pressed against the wall. Her eyes flickered open to see Bellamy widely smiling at her. His hair completely disheveled, his lips were swollen, a soft glow to the pigment of his skin.

Bellamy couldn’t hold back his satisfaction as he stared back at a clearly frustrated Clarke. Her neck slowly growing red, her lips even plumper than before, the hunger in her eyes.

“What?” Clarke rolled her eyes as she raised an eyebrow at him.

Bellamy flashed her one more smile before he wrapped one arm around her waist, pulling her off the ground once more. His lips didn’t leave hers as he carried her towards the small bed in the corner of the room. Carefully he lied her down. His hand supporting her head until it was pressed against the pillow, pressing soft kisses to her neck as he held himself above her.

Clarke tightened her hands around his shirt pulling his body on top of hers. It was like they couldn’t ever be close enough for her satisfaction. Every inch of her craving more of him.

It wasn’t until they heard the heavy opening of the door that Clarke pushed Bellamy off of her. Bellamy immediately hit the floor beside her bed.

Harper stepped through the door to see Clarke lying back in bed and Bellamy rubbing his shoulder on the floor. Both of their appearances completely hot and bothered. Looking back and forth between the two she simply smiled to herself.

As Clarke opened her mouth Harper held up her hand, placing two guns on the edge of the bed. “Just meet us in the control room when you’re done. We need to head out.” And with that Harper made her way out of the small cell.

Clarke and Bellamy both let out an awkward laugh as they sat back up. The two of them exchanging an awkward look before standing up.

“I guess we should go.” Bellamy picked up a gun tucking it into his holster as he stared down at Clarke.

Clarke picked up the gun leaning down to tuck it into her boot in front of him, her eyes locked on his. “I guess we should.”

It was like a punch to the gut as he watched her walk towards the door, every part of him wanting to grab her by the arm and finish what they’d started. But something told him this encounter wouldn’t be the last.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi loves I really hope you enjoyed this fic because I sooooo enjoyed writing it. It was once again inspired by twitter user @bellarkefeel . But yeah this is a mix of that with the angsty fighting fic I wanted to write. Please leave comments I enjoy them. You can leave them here or tweet me @thand100feels . I especially want feedback for this fic because this is like my first actual attempt at some pg-13 smut or whatever so like opinions are much needed. I love interacting with readers so please do talk to me. I'll also take any prompts you'd like me to write for bellarke I do just about anything.  
> xx
> 
> Harqueen


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